When Everyone Is Getting Married But You
Have you ever opened Facebook or Instagram and found your feed flooded with wedding photos? If you’re single, it can feel like everyone is getting married—except you.
I remember in 2020 when an old classmate asked about my life. She was shocked to hear I was still single. She told me that many of our classmates were married, and some were even expecting their first child. For a moment, I felt sad. But then I heard God gently remind me:“Don’t compare your season with someone else’s season.”
God spoke to my heart, explaining that I shouldn’t measure my life against others. He reminded me that earlier that year, He had called me to a season of singleness—a time to heal, grow, and prepare for marriage. Looking back, I realize that 2020 became a year of deep inner healing for me.
Why Preparation Matters
You might wonder, “Why is inner healing so important?” Well, without it, the hurts from my past would have erupted like a volcano in my future marriage, causing unnecessary pain.
Many people think marriage will “fix” their wounds, but the truth is—marriage magnifies what’s already inside you. If you carry unhealed pain, it will surface sooner or later. That’s why God, in His wisdom, leads us into seasons of preparation before bringing us into a new season of blessing.
The Time to Prepare, Like Esther
“Prepare, prepare, prepare!” That’s what I kept hearing from God when I asked Him, “When will my marriage happen?” My pastor even told me a secret: You can ask God when your marriage will happen, and He’ll tell you.God revealed to me that I would be married in 2022. And time and time again, He confirmed it.
While waiting for marriage, it’s important to use this season of singleness wisely. We can take inspiration from Esther, who spent an entire year preparing herself before meeting the king.
The Bible tells us in Esther 2:12:“Before a young woman’s turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics.”
If Esther, a woman chosen by God for a royal purpose, had to undergo a season of preparation, how much more should we as women of God? Our preparation should go beyond external beauty to emotional, mental, and spiritual readiness.
Use This Time Wisely
Before God brings you into your next season, He prepares you in this one—embrace the process, for His timing is perfect.Here are some ways to use this time well:
✅ Deepen your relationship with God
✅ Learn to receive joy from God – to be content without your dependance on man.
✅ Heal from past wounds and disappointments
✅ Get involved in your church and serve
✅ Surround yourself with married and single friends who are spiritually mature
✅ Learn from godly marriages and hear teachings on it
Remember, preparation now will lead to a stronger, healthier marriage later. Instead of focusing on when it will happen, focus on who you are becoming.
God’s timing is perfect, and when your season arrives, you’ll be ready for it.
XOXO,
Alisha Joji
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