Sexual abuse is any interaction or contact (visual, verbal, psychological or physical) where a weaker person is being used by other for sexual gratification.
As a girl, you have every right to guard yourself from being treated as an object of abuse. Girls, don’t be naïve. Why is your uncle sending you late night messages? Why does your boss want you all alone for the meeting most of the time? Read between the lines, learn to understand the motives behind what people do and why they do.
• When faced with above, immediately cut off from all forms of contact or communication with that person. Run away from ‘’extraloving’’ uncles, cousins, bosses and do whatever it takes to stop the abuse.
• When your man, or a friend or anyone starts to abuse you, there is a deeper root that needs to be dealt with. It’s not your assignment to take it in your hands to make him overcome it, leave it to the one he is accountable to.
• Don’t keep quiet. Be bold and make your displeasure evident. As someone put it: “Becoming angry with someone because of personal resentment or envy is sinful. But a holy anger, aroused by injustice or evil done, and accompanied by a sincere desire to see God’s will performed, is both healthy and effective.” (Jhn 2:13-16)
• Don’t go through this alone. Share with a trustworthy authority or a believer friend who is mature in the Lord.
Don’t let those in authority (like bosses, male church leaders, family members, teachers)
take advantage of you in any way. Bring it to the notice of your pastors or elders. Honoring and submitting to authorities does not mean allowing abuse and manipulation. Also, don’t let anyone manipulate you with God’s Word. That’s why it’s important that you know the Word of God in its entirety (Psa 119:160), and understand the Father’s heart behind what He says.
• Do you have fear of saying no? It’s not something to be ashamed of – you got to learn to please God rather than man, else people will walk all over you. Saying ‘no’ is so powerful and liberating. Let your statement be, ‘Yes, yes’ or ‘No, no’ (Mat 5:37). Also, don’t believe the lie that somehow you did something to make the other person hurt you. Even if you cooperated, they took advantage of you, so don’t feel dirty or condemned about yourself.
• Call out to God and ask Him to restore and heal you. He is your very present help in times of need. Even if it was an incident where lines were crossed, we want to tell you that your virginity cannot be taken away, it can only be given away – so you are still a virgin in God’s eyes. You are beautiful, loved, accepted by your Father. Bury your past and run the race that God has set before you.
XOXO,
Team Soar Girls
